But how could I accept?
by Mouna Nasake
Summary: The Dark War is finished.Harry is going out with Ginny, and Ron is getting married with Hermione.Everything is going well...except one detail:Draco Malfoy has decided reappear after one year of inexistence.A 10 chapters story.Slash HPDM.
1. Prologue:Gomenasai

**Disclaimer:** All Characters belong to JK Rowling. Nothing belongs to me!

**Warning:** This is a slash.Homophobes beware.

**Author's note:** This fanfiction is based on ten songs from the album of Tatu. It's my first fanfiction written in English.So don't be too severe.And PLEASE give me reviews!XD

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**But how could I ****accept?**

**Prologue: Gomenasai**

Draco Malfoy looked perfect this day. He had wanted to seem totally sure of himself and to look absolutely magnificent for this event. He was wearing a black suit assorted with his black hat. Only one problem remained: he was shaking when he entered the building. He was also trembling when he pressed the button of the elevator and met the Minister, Percy Weasley, who was going to his office. Trying not to look weak, he raised his head and put a cold look on his face. He finally got out on the 9th floor, the Department of Mysteries, where he knew the man he was looking for was. He moved forward in the corridor and stopped in front of the last door on the right side. Shaking his head and trying to set everything in his mind, he raised his arm and knocked, softly, on the door.

He heard a voice telling him to wait. No. Not 'a voice' but HIS voice. The voice of a man he had not seen for three years. The voice of the 20 years old hero who had saved the whole Wizarding World one year ago. Harry Potter's voice.

The door opened suddenly and his eyes fell at once on a great emerald ocean…which turned slowly into a dark green storm at his sight.

He knew that this would happen. But he had made a promise to himself: the promise of saying 'I'm sorry'. The promise of finding a friend, or more than a friend, that very day.

_**What I thought wasn't mine**_

_**In a lie**_

_**Was a one of a kind…**_

_**A precious pearl**_

_**When I wanted to cry**_

_**I couldn't 'cause I… wasn't allowed**_

_**Gomenasai for everything**_

_**Gomenasai I know I let you down**_

_**Gomenasai 'til the end **_

_**I never needed a friend like I do now…**_

_**What I thought was an old**_

_**So innocent**_

_**Was a delicate doll of porcelain…**_

_**When I wanted to call you and ask you for help **_

_**I stopped myself**_

_**Gomenasai for everything**_

_**Gomenasai I know I let you down**_

_**Gomenasai 'til the end **_

_**I never needed a friend like I do now…**_

_**What I thought was a dream**_

_**A mirage**_

_**Was as real as it seemed...**_

_**A privilege**_

_**When I wanted to tell you**_

_**I made a mistake**_

_**I walked away…**_

_**Gomenasai for everything**_

_**Gomenasai I know I let you down**_

_**Gomenasai 'til the end **_

_**I never needed a friend like I do now…**_

_**Gomenasai for everything**_

_**Gomenasai I know I let you down**_

_**Gomenasai 'til the end **_

_**I never needed a friend… like I do now…**_

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**_Did you like it?! Reviews reviews reviews!!!_**

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	2. Perfect ennemy

**Disclaimer:** All Characters belong to JK Rowling. Nothing belongs to me!

**Warning:** This is a slash.Homophobes beware.

**Author's note:** This fanfiction is based on ten songs from the album of Tatu. It's my first fanfiction written in English.So don't be too severe.And PLEASE give me reviews!XD

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**Chapter 1: Perfect Enemy**

Harry didn't know what the hell was Malfoy doing here, but he wasn't going to wonder very long.

'What the hell are you doing here Malfoy?' he asked in an angry voice.

To his greatest irritation, the blond man kept staring at him for a moment.

'I wanted to talk to you' he finally said. 'Can I please enter? I think we would be more comfortable inside your office.'

And without waiting for an answer he entered and sat in front of Harry's desk, taking off his hat with a self confidence that annoyed the dark-haired man very much.

'What d'you want?' enquired the Survivor, not trying at all to sound polite.

Draco Malfoy waited one minute again before talking with a quavering voice –which Harry didn't want to admit he had heard.

'I wanted to say…I'm sorry.'

Harry looked at him bewildered. He could not believe it. Draco Malfoy? That motherfucker who had pissed him off during his whole high school, who had tried many times to make him suffer, who had joined the Dark side, who had tried to kill Dumbledore! That guy DARED say 'I'm sorry'?!

'Get out of here!' he said in a freaky low voice.

'No wait! I'm sincere, I swear. Listen, I tried to help you all along! Me and Severus we…'

'Go away!'

Harry started raising his voice. How could that traitor talk to him about Severus, the one who had finished his dirty job? The one who had hated his parents, his godfather, his director, his favourite teacher, his friends and most of all, hated him!

'Potter! We were spies! All along, he and I followed the Order of the Phoenix! All along, we tried to help you. He died when the Dark Lord…'

'Voldemort…'

'When…When He discovered what we were doing. Severus died, and asked me to run away. Yes I did run away. I wouldn't have been able to fight. I'm a coward Potter, you know it. But I didn't help him. I didn't help that murderer.'

'I DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU SAY MALFOY! YOU WEREN'T THERE! YOU DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO HELP ME! YOU DIDN'T GIVE ANYTHING TO US! YOU DIDN'T EVEN SHOW ME YOU WERE ON OUR SIDE! HOW CAN I BELIEVE YOU?!'

'I tried to… I tried to do all I could. I was looking after you when you went to search for the horcruxes. I gave you elements all the way. I gave you clues, I followed you, I was worried for you, and I couldn't tell you that I was with you. I had to disappear totally from the surface of the world. I was nothing during two years Potter. I was like dead for everyone, even for my mother who loved me, even for my best friends. I told nobody where I was. I had to live dangerously during two whole years, Potter, and with no help! You had Weasley and Granger! I had NO ONE! Can you understand this?'

Draco was scared by the look on Harry's face. He didn't know what would happen after what he had just said and wished that it wouldn't be worse. His prayer was not granted.

'We have always been enemies Malfoy! Why?! Why do you come here suddenly, believing I will forgive everything, telling me stupidities like 'I'm sorry' when you perfectly know nothing can erase what you've done to me since we were kids! How do you want me to forgive what you said, what you did, what you didn't do?! Listen, Malfoy! I will never, ever let you try again. You'll forever be my PERFECT ENEMY!'

The old Gryffindor was staring at him. He seemed to be dazed. His hair had straightened on his head and Draco could distinctly feel his furious aura. He was strangely looking up and down very slowly at Draco and looked like he tried not to do something but couldn't. Actually, he looked as angry at himself as he was at Malfoy. Standing up, Draco looked one last time at Harry.

'Well, at least I would have tried.' He said, sounding incredibly weary.

Turning his back on Harry, he put back his hat on and walked forward to the door, his hand brushed slightly by Harry's who seemed to have been unable to control himself. He gave a start and Harry shuddered as he pushed on the door's handle.

'Good bye…Harry.' He concluded, before leaving, letting Harry puzzled and oddly desperate.

Harry knew that he had done the good choice, that he had been right. But he couldn't understand why, then, he felt like he had had everything wrong. He was angry at himself to have let his eyes fly on Draco Malfoy's face. His hat fit so well with his thin features and his skin's whiteness was so perfectly arranged with his clothes' darkness that Harry had not been able to take his eyes off of the blond man. He could remember his enemy's lips, thin and rosy, his blond locks falling softly on his face, his eyes, grey and blue, like two cold marbles. Furious, he wondered why Malfoy had called him 'Harry'. It was incomprehensible and he didn't want to understand it. He had been unable to stop himself raising his hand to touch Malfoy's. He had wanted it so badly that his hand had lift alone to join his enemy's, and realising it, he had shuddered, blushing slightly and hoping Malfoy wouldn't turn to him and see his reddened face.

There was a small voice in his mind telling him that maybe he had been all wrong. But he decided not to hear it. He had finished his day job and was going home where he would find –or not– his girlfriend, Ginny. Today, they had been going out for 4 years. He didn't know whether she would remember it or not, and believed that she wouldn't but tried to snap out of it, thinking that anyway he would be better at home, where he could forget about that stupid event and most of all stop thinking about his perfect enemy's –oh so beautiful– eyes.

_**Why should I welcome your domination?**_

_**Why should I listen to explanations?**_

_**I'm not pretending to make it simple!**_

_**Try to be something experimental!**_

_**You won't turn me up,**_

_**I will never fail!**_

_**Things I loved before are now for sale!**_

_**Keep yourself away, far away from me!**_

_**I'll forever stay your perfect enemy!**_

_**No longer awaiting,**_

_**Remove illusions,**_

_**No more complaining,**_

_**Forget confusion,**_

_**No more compassion,**_

_**Not sentimental,**_

_**I end up something experimental…**_

_**You won't turn me up,**_

_**I will never fail!**_

_**Things I loved before are now for sale!**_

_**Keep yourself away, far away from me!**_

_**I'll forever stay your perfect enemy!**_

_**You won't turn me up,**_

_**I will never fail!**_

_**Things I loved before are now for sale!**_

_**Keep yourself away, far away from me!**_

_**I'll forever stay your perfect enemy!**_

_**You won't turn me up,**_

_**I will never fail!**_

_**Things I loved before are now for sale!**_

_**Keep yourself away, far away from me!**_

_**I'll forever stay your perfect enemy!**_

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**Reviews reviews reviews!!!**


	3. Stars

**Disclaimer:** All Characters belong to JK Rowling. Nothing belongs to me!

**Warning:** This is a slash.Homophobes beware.

**Author's note:** This fanfiction is based on ten songs from the album of Tatu. It's my first fanfiction written in English.So don't be too severe.And PLEASE give me reviews!XD

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**Chapter 2: Stars**

Draco couldn't say that he hadn't expected this. He had known all along that this would happen. But he could not help feeling disappointed. Slightly disappointed? No : terribly disappointed. He had put all his hope in this particular meeting and it seemed to him that he had no point living anymore. He walked fast to get out of the Ministry of Magic and let his feet lead him to a Muggle road where he slowed down. It started raining as he felt suddenly very cold and sad. If it hadn't been a year after the Dark War's end, he would have thought that it was Dementors' acts but he knew that Dementors were wisely guarding Azkaban and that they would have no interest in patrolling in a Muggle place like this. Night was coming slowly and he knew that he would have to go home very soon. Rain was now coming hard on his cheeks and he curled up before turning left to a small dirty street. It seemed to him that the weather was reflecting what he felt and he thought he was lucky that It happened when the rain was so hard. Indeed, the drops hid his tears as the living part of his mind realised that it was the first time he remembered being crying.

He turned left again as he recognized the street where his best friend lived. He decided to go and see her.

After three soft knocks on the wooden door, Pansy Parkinson's voice told him to wait two minutes. He thought that she might have given a start at the sound, given the sudden agitation in the house.

She finally opened to him and he was a bit surprised to see her in underwear looking breathless.

'Dray?! What are you doing here?' She asked, with a worried voice.

Trying not to think that he had already heard nearly the same sentence just a couple of hours before, he looked up at her, in a way that meant 'I cried, I'm cold, and it's raining so please let me enter and then I'll explain…'

Letting him in, she repeated her question following him to the kitchen.

He started telling her what had happened in Harry's office, trying to stop his tears gliding down his cheeks. He was describing the way Harry had been looking at him very strangely when a sudden vividness attracted his look.

A barely dressed red-haired girl was standing in front of him, turning slightly pink at his sight.

'What are you doing here?!' they said at the same time.

'I think I have the right to come and see my best friend when I want or need to.' Draco answered, raising one of his eyebrows and letting appear no sign of his lately broken heart. 'What are YOU doing here, now, Weasley?' he repeated coldly.

She turned really red at this and looked at Pansy for some help.

Pansy stayed silent for a minute and then said with a small voice:

'I…was having some good time with Ginny as you can see… isn't it quite ironic? You want to have her boyfriend for you while I am sleeping with her?' she finally said with a small sad smile.

'Don't say that Pans'!' Ginny said, now scarlet. 'And what is that story about you and Harry? What is she talking about?' she added turning to face Draco.

'I… I went to ask him to forgive me today…and he didn't.'

'Of course he didn't! Where were you those past 3 years? What have you been doing Malfoy?! Nothing! You've helped Voldemort and then you simply ran away, you coward! Can you just imagine how hard it has been for him?!'

'And would he forgive you if he knew you were sleeping with my best friend Weasley? Have you told him? Maybe I should…'

Now Ginny turned pale. Draco knew he had touched a sensitive point.

She sat down and asked him for explanations, apparently feeling like she finally had no right to accuse him as she was as guilty as him. He explained again the whole thing and forced finally himself to finish the story.

'…And then I said 'Good bye, Potter.' 'He ended. He had the weird impression of being x-rayed and knew that Pansy had got the whole thing right.

'That doesn't explain why you said he wanted to 'Have my boyfriend' Pans'… ' Ginny started troubled, and apparently calmer than she was before.

Pansy looked exasperated, and at that very moment she looked very much like Granger, Draco thought, amused.

'Yes it does…'she said, sounding like someone who tries to explain something very difficult to a very stupid kid. 'Draco really wants to have Harry. He...' she looked a bit scared by how Draco would react. 'He is in love with Harry Potter.'

Draco turned his head away wanting to hide the pink that was slowly coming to his cheeks. He was really embarrassed. He wouldn't have expected Weasley to be there and couldn't stand the fact of having such a conversation with her. But he knew that he had to be the nicest if he wanted to be forgiven by his nemesis.

'What?!' said the Weasley girl, looking disgusted. 'But how…?!' The stunned look on her face clearly meant that she had never thought about Draco as someone who was able to love, and even less of a boy who loved boys.

'It's true. I… What Pansy just said is true. And it has been so since I first met Ha…Potter.' Draco confirmed, still looking away.

'He's MY boyfriend, you won't have him!' exclaimed Ginny, sounding revolted.

Draco gave a small bitter laugh and finally looked at Ginny.

'Poor of him. I guess you would find it much worse if he was unfaithful to you than when you are unfaithful to him like you have just been before I arrived… If you love my best friend, Weasley, and if you want to have her then just do, I give you both my permission, but just help me have Harry. I don't think you love him as much as you did before, do you?' Draco said seriously.

'H…help you?' repeated Ginny, turning a violent scarlet once again. 'How could I help you anyway…I can't convince him to love you, nor to forgive you…'

'No but you can probably help me seeing him again. I don't ask you to get me the moon. I just want to see him, and to be near him during a minimum of three days during these next two weeks, before it is too late. Before he forgets about me again. If you do it then I won't tell him… what I saw today…'

Turning pale again, as Draco thought that she looked very much like a car's indicator, Ginny frowned.

'Are you threatening me?'

'Maybe I am…' Draco answered, getting to his feet, and putting back his hat again. 'Just think about it. If I don't see him in the next two weeks, Harry Potter will know what a traitor you are. Thank you for the welcoming Pans'. See you soon.'

And he left, a bit more joyful than he had been before coming here. He had found a great idea to have his wish realised. Threatening Ginny Weasley was very easy, now. Good thing she had been sleeping with Pansy…

_**How did we ever go this far?**_

_**You touched my hand and start the core**_

_**And for the first time in my life, I'm crying**_

_**Are we in space 'til we belong?**_

_**Some place where no one calls a grown**_

_**And like the stars we burn away to miles…**_

_**How did we ever get this far?**_

_**It shouldn't have to be this hard**_

_**Now for the first time in my heart I'm flying**_

_**Are we in love 'til we deserve to build the shame of this whole world?**_

_**And like the night we get more flush.. Denial…**_

_**How did we ever go this far?**_

_**You touched my hand and start the core**_

_**And for the first time in my life, I'm crying**_

_**Are we in love 'til we deserve to build the shame of this whole world?**_

_**And like the night we get more flush.. Denial…**_

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Revieeeewwws! XD 


	4. All the things he said

**Disclaimer:** All Characters belong to JK Rowling. Nothing belongs to me!

**Warning:** This is a slash.Homophobes beware.

**Author's note:** This fanfiction is based on ten songs from the album of Tatu. It's my first fanfiction written in English.So don't be too severe.And PLEASE give me reviews!XD

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**Chapter 3****: All the things he said**

Ginny had arrived at Harry's apartment a bit later than he had, the day of his meeting with Malfoy. When he had asked her what she had done that day she had answered that she had been visiting an old friend of hers who was at Hogwarts in the same year than her. A bit sad, he had reminded her that it was the 4th birthday of their 'going out together' and she had looked very embarrassed. Harry wasn't surprised. Ginny had been like this since a quite long time. Going out every day without saying exactly where she was going, or who she was seeing. She sometimes totally forgot about Harry's existence and didn't come back at night, letting him sleep alone in his wide empty apartment. He was sure that she had fell in love with someone and thought sadly that he would have to finish his life alone or find someone else, which would be very hard for him.

That day, Harry had his mind full of Malfoy's face, of Malfoy's eyes, of Malfoy's hands, lips, skin, hair, suit, hat, full of Malfoy anyway. He couldn't stop himself thinking about the words he had said. _'I followed you, I was worried for you, and I couldn't tell you that I was with you. I had to disappear totally from the surface of the world.' _He was remembering this particular sentence. _'I was worried for you' _Malfoy had said and Harry couldn't understand it. Why the Hell had Malfoy been worried for him? When had the blond Slytherin started worrying for him?!

It was nearly one o'clock am when Harry, still repeating Malfoy's words got out silently of the bed for a walk in his apartment and found on the kitchen's table the invitation to Ron and Hermione's wedding which would be next week and would last two days, without counting the day when only he and his girlfriend were invited to stay with them. Smiling softly, he thought that it really was great for them to marry. He had always known that they would stay together in the end: they sounded so much like Ron's parents that it felt inevitable. Every time he compared his relation with Ginny with Ron and Hermione's, he couldn't help feeling a small heart-ache. He definitely was a bit jealous, since the year before, when Ginny had started giving her relation away, after a party where she had been alone, without Harry and where she had met some of her 'old Hogwart's mates'.

Anyway, that wedding was going to be a great occasion for him to have a good time, and to think of something more joyful than his job and his failing love story.

He got back in his bed where Ginny had already fallen asleep with this reassuring thought, before going unconscious, his mind full of Malfoy's pictures and words again.

o¤°O0** HPDMHPDMHPDMHPDM **0O°¤o

Harry spent the eight following days trying to go back to his "normal life". Normal meant for him: when he did not think about Draco Malfoy. So he went to work, he wrote papers, he talked with colleagues, and went to some missions against Dark-Magic users. But whatever he did, he couldn't stop himself thinking of his 'perfect enemy' as he had said. Perfect, yes he was, and Harry wished he could find a way to stop it, to convince himself it had been right to push him away , to find an excuse for his stupid heart beating.

Ginny seemed to have lost her habits this week, because each time he asked her where she had been, she answered that she had been to her brother's to see Hermione, who Harry thought had lost any contact with his girlfriend.

He thought that maybe Ginny wanted to help for her brother's wedding, even though he was surprised that she had remembered it.

o¤°O0** HPDMHPDMHPDMHPDM**0O°¤o

Harry had promised his two best friends that he would come to the Burrow one day before everyone. So the day before the wedding, he disapparated and arrived in front of a gigantic sort of house that had what seemed to be snow on it, and on every wall and door without any space for anything else.

He looked at it bewildered before understanding that this was the Burrow, decorated for the wedding with Mrs Weasley's magic.

Smiling to himself, happy to meet his favourite wizarding family again, he knocked on the snowed door.

To his surprise and disappointment, it was Ginny who opened to him without greeting and flushed before turning her back on him.

He entered and his eyes fell directly on the twins who were wearing black suits and an ear to ear smile on their faces.

'Harry! It's good you came now!' said Fred.

'We were trying our new suits…' George explained.

'… for little Ronnie's birthd…'continued Fred

'… wedding Fred, wedding.' George completed.

'How've you been doin' mate?!' they asked at exactly the same moment.

'Well er… very hum…very w…' started Harry wondering if what he was going to say was true.

'Harry!' Mrs Weasley cut over him, to his great gratitude. 'You can't imagine how glad I am to see you! My little Harry! Are you hungry?'

He started stammering but before he could say anything sense, he was forced to sit on a chair in the kitchen where he was given Mrs Weasley's soup. With delight, he tasted the liquid he hadn't been able to have for one year. Since the day before the Final Battle. Smiling, he looked up to Mrs Weasley.

'Where are Ron and Hermione?' he asked.

'Ha! Don't talk about Ron! This little thoughtless… He STILL hasn't chosen his suit for tomorrow, and I'm lucky that I'll soon have a daughter in law as Hermione because SHE is the only one who thought about it.' She turned to her sons and her daughter with a black piercing look. The three of them curled up, embarrassed. 'Well, anyway, his fiancée took him to Diagon Alley. They'll be back soon.' And she looked up to the clock on the opposite wall, where Ron's hand was on _'travelling'_.

Harry finished swallowing his soup, and got up to his feet. He decided to go up in what Mrs Weasley had called the Changing room, with his bags and try his own suit.

It was red and black: the only colours he kept on wearing. He searched in his bag for the ring he had bought five days ago especially for the wedding. It was a thin ring with a lion engraved on it

He was threading it on his finger when the door of the room opened.

'No you HAVE to try it on Ron! You can't just put it tomorrow! We'll have to go back there if it doesn't fit!' Hermione was saying.

'I don't want to try it on, it's okay, it WILL fit! Stop stressing everybody Herm!' Ron answered.

'But what if it doesn't?! You're going to be in a really bad situation if the suit doesn't fit you and WE'RE going to…Harry!!'

Finally noticed, Harry smiled at Hermione who hugged him emotionally, happy to her best friends again.

'Hey! What's up Harry?! 'Asked Ron, now smiling too, letting the big plastic bag he was holding fall to give him a friendly hit on the back.

'Well nothing much…I was just…trying my outfit.' He said, now smiling even more in front of Hermione's look which clearly meant '_see Ron, even Harry is more responsible then you!'_

'Come on we should go up in our room, it'll be more comfortable.' Ron said going out of the small changing room, and climbing the stairs quickly before the two others could say anything else.

Ron's room had changed: instead of his small bed with the Chudley Canons' pictures on it, there was a two places white fitted bed.

The posters on Ron's wall had also been taken off, and now there were only a few framed photographs. Harry went closer to look at them. He recognised Ron's whole family, on a photograph he had seen in the Daily Prophet, when they had all been in Egypt, years ago. Walking to another, he saw Hagrid, and the twelve years old Ron, Hermione and Him. He was wondering who had taken this one when he saw Ron spitting slugs everywhere and understood it was Colin Crivey who had taken it. Then he saw a photograph of Bill and Fleur's wedding, with the two of them and the whole Weasley family. Even Ron's hated aunt was here. He walked to the last two photographs, and saw on the two of them the Order of the Phoenix, the Weasleys, Hermione and him but at different times. The first one had been taken the first time Harry had seen the Order, just before their fifth year at Hogwarts. The second one had been taken less than a year ago, after the end of the Dark War. On the first one he could see Sirius, Remus, Snape, Charlie Weasley, Kingsley, Professor McGonagall, and Hagrid… who were not on the second one.

Pain came to his heart, as he saw their faces. Too many people had died during this war. And other ones had betrayed, like Snape or Charlie. Charlie, who had, at everyone's surprise and displeasure killed Kingsley and run away to the side of The Dark Lord.

'Harry! Are you listening to me?' said Hermione's worried voice.

Giving a start, Harry turned to her saying 'sorry, I hadn't heard you…'.

Raising an eyebrow, his best friend gave a look at her fiancé who was looking impatient and turned to him again.

'I was telling you two that I have news that probably won't make you feel happy.' She repeated, apparently embarrassed to have to break the news to them. 'I…em… Ginny and I decided to invite two people more than we had said. And these people are some of the ones I know you don't want to see…'

'Go on, stop beating about the bush.'

'Well…' Now Hermione was flushing, and looking at the white tiles. 'I…We…We invited Malfoy and Parkinson.'

'WHAT?!' Ron and Harry screamed in the same time.

Harry looked at her, creepily, and got out of the room, slamming the door behind him. He went out in the garden where he petrified Gnomes in order to unwind himself.

What scared him the most was not the fact that Hermione had invited Malfoy and Parkinson, but the fact that his heart had missed a beat when she had said 'Malfoy AND PARKINSON'. Was the blond going out with her? Were the two old mates together? Were they fiancés? Was the Slytherin in love with her?

Even more annoyed with himself than he had been before, Harry kicked an ill looking plant, before sitting on a small bench which was as white as the house next to it.

Why the hell did he react like this? He should've been angry at Hermione, he should've screamed at her that he didn't want to see the stone-marten and that he didn't want to see his fucking face, his stupid lips, his white skin, aaargh…

He couldn't even think it. He DID want to see him again. He wanted to contemplate again those thin blond and sweet locks, to lose himself again in those blue-grey eyes. But he couldn't accept the fact that Malfoy was with Parkinson: that little black-haired bitch, that little affected and brainless girl. He couldn't accept the fact that Malfoy looked in her eyes with his, touched her skin with his hands or kissed her lips with his…_'damn'_he thought, totally depressed by his own thoughts. He couldn't deny it now. He was definitely and entirely jealous. Why? He didn't know it yet. But he was jealous… That was a fact; a fact that he would have to hide and to forget.

'Harry, are you here?' Ron was calling him from behind the low wall which went alongside the Burrow.

'Yeah' he said, though he would have preferred to stay alone for a moment, in order to put his mind together.

'Damn bad news, isn't it?' said his best friend, sitting next to him.

'Yeah, quite bad.' Harry answered.

'Herm said that Malfoy and Parkinson had been on our side at the end of the war even if they didn't show it, and that they were not that mean, that they could be nice if they wanted to and that it would be rude not to invite them.' Ron sighed, apparently depressed too, but for totally different reasons. 'And I thought it would be the best day of my life…'

'Are they going out together?' Harry asked suddenly.

'Who?' Ron looked puzzled.

'D…Malfoy and Parkinson…Hermione said they were coming together'.

'Why are you interested in that?' asked Ginny's voice, coming near them.

Harry whitened and mumbled an 'I'm not…' as Ron raised an eyebrow and looked at him.

'They've been going out together for years Harry. Don't you remember at Hogwarts? Everybody said that they were the perfect Slytherin couple. They're both as dumb as a Giant Troll. 'Perfect couple' they said…Most disgusting one, I say…'Ron said, now completely immersed in his insults to the Slytherins, while Harry's heart sank and his face whitened even more if possible.

'Are you okay Harry? You look lost and pale…'enquired Ginny who was looking at him with a look that X-rayed him. He decided to pull himself together again and try not to look so touched.

Ginny was going to talk again when Hermione came, to Harry's relief.

'RON! You haven't tried your outfit on yet! And, Ginny, you've got to try your dress on too, come on. Oh Harry, you shouldn't dirty your suit in the garden, come and change now…'

Harry realised that he was, indeed, still wearing his red and black suit and the three of them followed her back in the house, while Harry thought with a small laugh that Hermione sounded more and more like her future mother in law.

'_I followed you, I was worried__ for you, and I couldn't tell you that I was with you. I had to disappear totally from the surface of the world.' 'I was worried for you' 'worried for you'…_

And at this precise moment Harry Potter thought vaguely about committing suicide.

_**All the things he said, all the things he said, running through my head…**_

_**All the things he said…**_

_**This is not enough…**_

_**I'm in serious shit I feel totally lost**_

_**If I'm asking for help it's only because**_

_**Being with you has opened my eyes**_

_**I could never believe such a perfect surprise**_

_**I keep asking myself, wondering why**_

_**I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out**_

_**Wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me**_

_**Nobody else so we can be free**_

_**Nobody else so we can be free!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said,**_

_**Running through my head… running through my head…**_

_**Running through my head!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said,**_

_**Running through my head… running through my head…**_

_**All the things he said!**_

_**This is not enough…**_

_**This is not enough!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said!**_

_**And I'm all mixed up feeling cornered and rushed**_

_**And they say it's my fault but I want him so much**_

_**Wanna fly him away where the sun and rain**_

_**Coming over my face, wash away all the shame**_

_**When they stop and stare, don't worry me**_

'_**Cause I'm feeling for him what he's feeling for me**_

_**I can try to pretend, I can try to forget**_

_**But it's driving me mad going out of my head!**_

_**Al the things he said, all the things he said**_

_**Running through my head… running through my head…**_

_**Running through my head!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said,**_

_**Running through my head… running through my head…**_

_**All the things he said!**_

_**This is not enough…**_

_**This is not enough!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said!**_

_**Mother looking at me, tell me! What do you see?**_

_**Yes I lost my mind!**_

_**Daddy looking at me, tell me! What do you see!**_

_**Have I crossed the lines?**_

_**Al the things he said, all the things he said**_

_**Running through my head… running through my head…**_

_**Running through my head!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said,**_

_**Running through my head… running through my head…**_

_**All the things he said!**_

_**This is not enough…**_

_**This is not enough!**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said**_

_**All the things he said… all the things he said**_

* * *

**Haa... I like this one. XD I stopped at a good moment. XD Haha. I love Me XD. lol  
**


	5. Malchik Gay

**Disclaimer:** All Characters belong to JK Rowling. Nothing belongs to me!

**Warning:** This is a slash.Homophobes beware.

**Author's note:** This fanfiction is based on ten songs from the album of Tatu. It's my first fanfiction written in English.So don't be too severe.And PLEASE give me reviews!XD

* * *

**Chapter 4 : Malchik Gay**

The weather was perfect for a wedding ceremony. The sky was a shade of clear blue, in total contrast with Draco Malfoy's heart weather. It was definitely rainy inside him and he thought now with desperation that maybe he shouldn't have come.

The Weasley's house was not exactly like he had imagined it. He had always thought they might live in a really small and dirty sort of house, badly built and in a horrible brown-greenish color. And THIS was completely different. He even thought, against himself that the house was quite enjoyable. The quietness of the place, the whiteness of the walls, the flashy colors of the garden, the luxuriant flowers and the fact that everything was perfectly clean, soft and precisely arranged mad him think that Granger had probably helped her mother in law for the decoration, and that Ron the weasel had certainly not touched anything of this.

It was 5pm and people were now arriving, one by one. He walked to the portal in front of which ere positioned the Weasley twins, Fridgard and Gregoire or something like that, and was saluted in a special way reserved to him.

'Hello **Mal**foy!' started one of them.

'Have you spent a good year since your **Mal**evolent**Ma**ster has died?'

'He was very**Mal**icious wasn't he?'

'But you are**Mal**ignant so you must be okay…'

'Oh, don't believe we are **Mal**ign of course, we don't say anything with **Mal**ice…'

'Yeah, that would be a **Mal**practice if we did…'

'Now have a good time in our house with your **Mal**e,**Mal**foy…'

'And eat well! We don't want you to bear **Mal**nutrition, do we?'

Keeping his head raised and a cold look on his face, Draco entered the garden without looking at the twins. The party was going to be like this all along and if he started losing control already, he would not be able to get what he wanted to obtain.

He searched Pansy with his eyes wondering if she had already arrived or if he had been more punctual than her.

Finally arriving on a side of the Wall of the 'Burrow', Draco saw a burst of white light, and a patronus like little animal ran into the air and passed just next to him. It looked a bit like the stone-marten Mad-Eye Moody had once transfigured him in…However it was not Harry's stag. Thinking it was probably the weasel's patronus or the Mudblood's, he approached a bit and was very surprised to see that it was no one else than Harry who was holding high his wand apparently trying to force himself thinking about good stuffs. Draco decided to show himself when he was sure that his black-haired 'enemy' was alone.

'Did I dream or was it a stone-marten I just saw flying out of your wand, Potter?' he asked with a small mocking smile, an eyebrow raised in what he hoped to be a very sexy way.

To his surprise and disappointment, Harry was able to control himself very well, and after lowering his wand, talked to him with an icy voice he thought sounded very much like his.

'Yeah, it was definitely a stone-marten. I think the memory of you transfigured like that was a very very good thought, and my patronus just turned into… this…' Harry said with a small grimace of disgust. 'Now go away Malfoy, it's annoying enough to have you invited here, I don't want you to stay on my side during the party…It might spoil everything…'he added, turning his back on Draco.

The blond man looked at Harry's back, his features softened and saddened. The Green-eyed wizard was wearing a red and black suit, and at his right hand he was wearing a golden ring. Draco was definitely starting to think about running away. Leave the wedding would be a good thing, and he was already starting to walk away from the place where the man he loved was when a voice made him give a start.

'Don't even think about it Dray!' said Pansy firmly.

'Excuse me??' Draco asked, puzzled, turning round to look at her.

'You were going to run away. You were going to leave! Don't try to deny it! I can read in you as easily as you can read in Weasley!'

Draco sighed and let himself collapse on a small bench. He had always been troubled and paradoxically admiring of Pansy's way of detecting every thought he had and every feeling he felt before he had told her anything. She was probably the only person he knew who was able to do this with him. Maybe it was because she was the person who knew him the most. But sometimes it could be very embarrassing… Like the day when she had discovered that he was in love with Harry. That very day, he was still in year 6 at Hogwarts and he had just been sent to the hospital wing because of Potter who had cast a spell on him… something like sectusamper… He had been bleeding for hours when Pansy had finally entered the room, asking Mrs. Pomfrey if she could see him. She had sat next to him and he had pretended to sleep. But she had seen at once that it was just faking and had told him to stop acting.

'Now Dray tell me how it happened...'

Draco had told her most of the things that had happened before he had fallen on the ground, unconscious.

'…and then he went with that curse, I don't know where he found it, and he just cast it on me… ' he finished, turning his face away not to show his friend how sad he was.

'Well, it doesn't really matter does it? It's not like he was going to have nothing for this. He'll get detention for that, won't he? And it's not either as though he had betrayed you or else, he has always hated you just as you have hated him, hasn't he?'

Draco couldn't bear what his best friend told him, because it DID matter very much to him: the fact that he had been crying in front of Harry, the fact that even after seeing him like this Harry had cast that spell on him, the fact that he hadn't been able to prevent himself from casting a Cruciatus Curse at the Gryffindor and the fact that, yes, Harry had always hated him… A tear had glided on Draco's cheek before he had turned his face to Pansy again, to see her look at him with an utterly bewildered look and her eyes wide opened.

'Don't…don't tell me you are…'she had started, smiling more and more in a very sardonic way…'you're in love with Potter?!!!' she had finally said very loudly before bursting in an uncontrollable laughter.

Turning scarlet, Draco had thought it really wasn't a good day. However, now he was in the same situation again and he was quite bored with it.

Smiling slightly at the memory, Draco looked at Pansy who was apparently expecting something to be said. He said nothing.

'Well? What is your plan now?' she said.

'My _plan_?!' Draco said now feeling totally lost. Girls were too complicated for him, he thought.

'Yeah! How do you want to approach your Male my dear boy?' asked the black-haired girl in a very severe look.

'Em… I didn't really think of anything you know…I didn't prepare the… well, I dunno…'Draco was very embarrassed now. He hadn't planned anything and he felt a bit stupid now as Pansy said it. He should have thought of a calculated strategy which would assure him an undisputable victory. 'Could you, er… help me find a plan?' he asked, nibbling his lip with stress.

'You can count on me Dray! Wait here I'll be back in a minute.' Pansy replied, winking at him, before walking away.

** Handsome  
Tender  
Soft  
Why do you look right through me  
thinking  
"No"  
I can't deny my feelings  
Growing strong  
I try to keep believing  
dreaming on  
And every time I see you  
I crave more  
I wanna pull you closer  
closer  
closer  
closer  
but you leave me feeling frozen**

** Malchik gay  
I can be  
all you need  
Won't you please  
stay with me  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
Apologies, might-have-been's  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
can't erase what I feel  
Malchik gay, gay**

** Choking  
Back emotion  
I try to keep on hoping  
for a way;  
a reason for us both to  
come in  
close  
I long for you to hold me  
like your boyfriend does  
and though my dream is  
slowly fading  
I wanna be the object  
object  
object  
object  
of your passion but it's hopeless **

** Malchik gay  
I can be  
all you need  
Won't you please  
stay with me  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
Apologies, might-have-been's  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
can't erase what I feel  
Malchik gay, gay**

* * *

** Lol. Well this is the 4th chapter and the last one I wrote. You will have to wait a bit for the rest. Reviews!XD**


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